When Egos Collide
by thegroanofwind
Summary: Batman and Sherlock meet when they are forced to work together on a case.


_This story is based on the BBC Sherlock characters before I watched the show. I kinda saw Sherlock as this smug know-it-all and John just a sidekick._  
 _And I wrote Batman & Robin as opposites equal to this trait._

* * *

 **When egos collide**

"Detective." A man said with a deep voice.  
"Detective." Another man responded with an even deeper growl in his voice.  
And that is about the only thing the two men had in common.  
One was British, had thick brown hear, bright blue eyes and was quite tall. He was wearing a big black overcoat and smoking a pipe The other detective, an American, wearing a black suit and a cowl, revealing blue eyes and was equally tall as the first man, so the two could stare eachother in the eye.

The men were not eager to meet eachother. The meeting was arranged for them, they were only showing up because they got told to do so and the case required it. The stood in the shadow of a great oak tree in a park just outside the city. Dusk was setting in and a breeze cooled the air after a hot day.

"And you must be young Richard John Grayson." A third man assumed, nodding at a boy in his late teens standing next to the American detective.  
"Firstly, why do you think you know me? And secondly, who the heck are you?" The boy said fiercely , not expecting the man to know him.  
"I'm doctor Watson, I accompany detective Holmes for this must know why we're here. And your mask isn't fooling anyone Grayson or should I say 'Robin'."  
"Well we didn't need him in the first place, so why would we need you?" The boy squawked, not being fond of these British 'detectives' taking over their case.  
"Easy now Dick, these man are merely mistaken. Let's move out of the way so they can go back to the Queen's Country." The man in black tried to calm the boy down, while looking strictly in the eye of detective Holmes, not blinking once.  
And neither was he.

"You called for our help, so here we are." Holmes responded, without moving his lips.  
"We didn't call anyone for help! We're doing this for years without anyone's help, and we certainly don't need yours!"  
"Au contraire, Bruce, Commissioner Gordon likes to think differently."  
"How do you know who I am?" Batman responded.  
"Like I said, the mask isn't fooling anyone." Responded Watson "And we did our homework." Followed Holmes. "You really need to cover your tracks better."  
Bruce and Dick, now both getting fed up with these British know-it-alls, tried to look past their high-hat attitude to ask about what Commissioner Gordon thinks.  
"Why would Commissioner Gordon ask for YOUR help, if he has the world's greatest detective living right here in Gotham?" "Yeah!" Followed Dick.  
"Why do you think he hired us?" Asked Watson.  
"You're a detective, figure it out yourself!" Snarled Dick.  
"Oh but we have." Said Sherlock calm. "Might it be because the last time you went after Oswald - the Penguin - Cobblepot you blew up his casino and risking the lives of hundreds, if not thousand innocent men and women?"  
"They are not innocent." Said Batman. "If you knew Cobblepot, you know everything he owns and everyone in it are criminals. It's a big black market of laundering, drugs, weapons and whatever else he can get his fins on."  
"And it happened only once!" Dick filled in.  
"...Or might it be that you put Edward Nygma in an insane asylum, where he's still recovering from your 'interrogation'?" Sherlock continued, not paying attention to Batman's response.  
"It's where he belongs!" Said Grayson.  
"Don't we all." Sighed Sherlock.  
"Yet here we are, together, trying to solve a case with no leads, no prints and no evidence." Said Batman, trying to make things better.  
"Indeed we are, Bruce."  
Batman didn't like it when Sherlock called him Bruce. It made him feel little, because these men seemed to know so much about them.

"Then what are we still standing here for?" Said John. It got dark and the park they were in, had little lighting, so the men could hardly see Batman in his black uniform, in the shadow of the oak tree.

"Didn't you listen? We have no leads." Scoffed Dick .  
"How can you have no leads on a case of the most fearsome criminal?" Asked John.  
"He has no fingerprints, no collectible data and he leaves chaos and mayhem all over Gotham." Explained Bruce. "We can't catch him because he is never there and he's never been there, according to witnesses and the evidence we do find. He doesn't even have a name. We only know him as 'The Joker' because he leaves a playing card of a Joker at the crime scene."  
"Then there's your proof." Said Sherlock. "I think it's time we take over the case, and get this joker." His smirked at his own pun.  
"Nobody gets the Joker but me!" Said Batman sharp, his growl even deeper than before.  
"It seems you have a personal issue with this man?" Asked Sherlock. "Why is that?"  
"It's none of your business, 'detective'." Sneered Batman.  
"Is it because you're so much like him?" Asked Sherlock.  
"No!...-." Began Bruce.  
"Spreading fear among the people he doesn't like, short temper, masked, all dressed up, and on the run for the police? How is he any different than you?"  
"He kills innocent people!" Shouted Batman.  
"And you don't?" Responded Sherlock. "I think this is why Commissioner Gordon asked for our aid. He wants to get case solved without any casualties and without making the Gotham City Police Department look bad."  
"We don't make them look bad." Said Dick.  
"No? One, well two, masked vigilantes, blowing up buildings to get one supposedly criminal who is not guilty until otherwise judged by court, and delivering that man tied down at the police station? That certainly doesn't make them look good, now does it?"

"You go after the Joker then, if you're such a good detective! And you try not to make any casualties." Said Batman annoyed "Oh we will, and we won't." Said Sherlock calm.  
"One condition." Said Batman.  
"Yes?"  
"I want him before the police does."  
"So you're already assuming we WILL get him?" Smirked Watson.  
"No, I'm assuming if you get lucky enough to get close to him you might lead him to me."  
"Very well." Said Sherlock to end the conversation.  
"We'll show these clowns who the real detectives are." Thought Sherlock.  
"We'll show these queens who the real detectives are." Thought Batman.  
Batman and Robin dissapeared into the night and Holmes and Watson walked around the oak tree, to get to the path leading them out of the park.

"30 degrees and that man is wearing a latex suit, unbelievable." Watson sighed, shaking his head.  
"It's spandex John."


End file.
